What Is Up With This World?

Wow, what a day! I awoke early this morning so I could have breakfast with my mom at the nursing home. We ate in her room and had a delicious, quiet, calming meal. I left around 9 a.m. and did some grocery shopping for my dad and picked up a few items for my mom, before returning to have lunch with her. Let me just say, that was quite an experience. ALL HECK HAD BROKEN LOOSE BY THIS POINT IN THE DAY.

Apparently, the nitpicky, petty and obnoxious behavior that so many younger people exhibit does not necessarily cease when you become elderly. I had the unique opportunity to make some most interesting observations. Yes, I'm being nice when I put it that way . . .

I felt like I was in the middle of a turf war at one point. There were rival factions all over the lunchroom. I (wrongly) assumed that the residents would be sitting and eating "together" and apparently I had this twisted idea that they would be singing Kumbayah or something like that. Wrong. So wrong.

I watched Wheelchair Bumper Car, which can best be described as a variation of bumper cars like you see at the fair or at an amusement park, except Wheelchair Bumper Cars involve what else - wheelchairs. One elderly man was "claiming sets", kind of like the Bloods and Crips, if you will. No one was going to encroach upon HIS territory. He didn't want anyone sitting at "his table." Once he saw that no one was paying any attention to his griping, he began randomly bumping other residents' wheelchairs. At that point, color me shocked because I just was not expecting to see such a display of macho manhood. I am thinking that he's having some sort of a spell or something so I go to get "help", right? Wrong again. He apparently does that at every meal where he leaves his lair. I learn later that he used to be a drill sargeant in the Army. Go figure.

After Wheelchair Bumper Car ended, I was privy to Screamfest '08, which is basically a yelling match between two elderly residents. It was very obvious there was a lot of animosity between the man and woman - so much so that I think I was a little afraid. What if they get loose? What if they head toward me? These are the things running through my mind at that time - that and, just the sheer amusement of it. All I can say, is that it's a good thing that neither of them were 80 years younger, or there was a strong possibility they could have injured each other - or themselves. Yes, lots of threats were made back and forth - idle threats, though, as neither could wheel themselves to the other's table. Good thing for that. 92.5% of what they were yelling at each other was completely unintelligible, but I am pretty sure they meant business. ;-)

Medicine Time rolled around shortly thereafter. Mmmmm, the fun the nurses must have at Medicine Time! I don't know if you have ever tried to give a cat a pill, but if you have, I am sure you can imagine how utterly fulfilling Medicine Time must be for the "dispenser". I could compare it to giving 100 cats a pill. And it's nearly as dangerous - at least from what I witnessed!

I will tell you that I have a new view of nursing home staff members. If they last 5 minutes, they must be angels. Wow, what a day! It's been said that you live and you learn and what I learned today is that people do not necessarily become more well behaved as they age! :-)

Though the events recorded above true and correct to the best of my recollection, I do say all of this in jest - all except the part about the nursing home staff. Their jobs are truly not easy!